!! The Dirty Persian !!

P10: Almost Fight + Girls That Are White = Fun Night

2009-04-14T18:38:00.000-07:00

I am a genius. And you shall find out why (if you haven’t already figured that out :p) Note: this is a very eventful post :)

Ever since Cognac Lounge back in February I’ve been chillin w/ that cool Chinese guy. Yeah he’s fun to be around, but prob THE worst wingman out there. I see people like him on Keys to The VIP all the time. The ones that have lots of friends but can’t do cold cuts all because they rely on that social value. It’s pretty funny. He doesn’t know about this PUA stuff so he doesn’t recognize that it’s all in his head, but I do so I could tell when he’s afraid to jump off the train. Kids don’t take anything from him! BUT I have been more social w/ my friends from school so I am growing in that sense.

Anyways I went to another event over MARCH BREAK. Didn’t turn out as well as the other ones. This time I was with a whole entourage of people, not the best idea cuz I ended up getting good old AA again...I seriously hate these things. Too many cocks & too many girls who think they’re all that. You gotta spend FOREVER walking around to find a free girl, then when you

do there’s a good chance they’re the ones that don’t like guys grinding on them (hence the fact that they’re alone). & some of them just go for those big tall black guys, not a

short skinny Persian kidd. There’s a pic of me & some girls & another guy, so you get an idea of what I’m talking about :). I can’t lie that kid is nice, clean, layed back & chill. Then there’s me going like :| aww

But I never let that bother me over the next few days. Picked up one omfggfyuwegcuyhweHB10 that i was texting. She had a bf and she gave me her number. Won’t give you too many details about her but I picked her up by going direct. So for those of you out there that are scared to go direct, you’re missin out buddy!

_______________________________

Now why I am a genius, here is my story:

On April 3^rd I went to a local party at a Community Centre that some kids organized in Stouffville (its north of Markham, which is north of Toronto). I had pretty much the same entourage from March break, plus I saw a few of my old hockey buddies!! Yeaaaahh

The beginning of that night was total shit cuz the speakers kept on malfunctioning & the music would stop every few songs. At one point this lasted for a long whiiiillee.

In the time the speakers were out me and my boys started talking to some people we knew. There were two girls (my friend’s friends), one of them was half Chinese. The super cute one saw me and said “Omg hey! Do you remember me??” I look deep into her sexy half-chinked eyes and say “No,” Then I hold her hand, raise it in the air and continue “Here give me a little spin” and she, happily, follows :) I’m the man.

Bullshit. But I wish I did that :(. As it turns out I knew her from before, and apparently I picked up one of her friends from a while back! Score! Social value up! I feel like I just gained a level in Pokémon!

Eventually the music came back on & stayed that way. That’s when people started dancing since we don’t know when the next time it’s gonna stop! Maybe the broken speakers weren’t too bad...

After a few grinds, I was running out of girls to grind on (local dance event). I see one in a group with this total bitch that used to go to my school but I still talk to anyway bitch (again, local dance event). Plus it was We Takin’ Over (one of my fav songs). I started grinding that bitch’s friend & singing along with it!

A plus about these local events is that the girls receive a smaller abundance of guys. It’s more local so I guess they feel safe & are more willing to grind with you. Cuz this girl wouldn’t leave after like 4 songs straight.

I realized we couldn’t keep grinding like this or it would get boring, so as one would do in bed, I told that woman to turn around! & she obviously did and we went front to front, hugging really close & dancing along. Eruiabyrur Thats my fav kind of dancing! :D It seriously is, I love the closeness. So warm :)

So we’re doing that & feeling each other. Nothing below the belt of course. But when in a situation like that I say let your hands run free. Which is kinda ironic but w/e, it’s true. Wherever they wanted to go I let them. Eventually she brought hers to my hair (head hair, not chest hairs) & mine went up to her neck where there’s skin to touch (she was wearing one of those slim sweaters). We stopped moving our hips to the song & slowly swayed as we entangled our sweaty bodies together (Eww I got girl-sweat on my shirt!) and it was pretty nice. At that point I remembered something Mystery said a loonnngg time ago about gently grabbing the back of a girl’s hair & it feeling really good. So I did that and I swear to god I heard a slight moan. Crazy shit. I didn’t want to give her too much so I brought my hand back down to her neck & held it firm. Now I see why some pornstars sometimes choke each other when they’re having sex. Cool!

Eventually they played a faster song so we started moving our hips fast again (I led that bitch!). But then eventually that stupid bitch that used to go to my school came back & was like “Pairo, I need to borrow my friend!” Now I started using my natural instincts and ignored whatever PUAs told me about Mother Hens and say “Aww, for how long?” (in a friendly tone of course). She answers “For the whole night! She actually has to go!”

We then break up from our embrace (& I was really sweaty man) but we still had 1 arm around each other’s shoulders. I sigh and say “Alright, what’s your info?” and hand her my cellphone. She gives me hers and we exchange. Sweet! I got a number! Her phone was nice too. I could tell she was a rich girl from around the area (the place was in a small town near Markham. Most of the people there were rich kids that live on farms & golf courses:) ) Then she leaves and I get back to the night.

As the night dwindled most of the girls & guys started leaving. It was around midnight at this point. There was only 1 group of girls still dancing & I was one of the few guys to still dance with girls. Here’s where things get interesting.

When I was with some of my boys, one of them stepped on my shoe by accident. I started joking around & yelling at him. Some guy by the wall starts yelling at me & asks me why I’m yelling at himself. I walk up to the guy by the wall & he asks me again why I was yelling at him. I tell him “I was talking to my friend. I don’t even know who the fuck you are, why would I yell at you?” and he gets pissed off that I swore at him & still thinks I yelled at him. I turn around, walk away back to my boys. He follows. The whole thing starts up again & he pushes me, but people step in & separate us.

Now there’s a huge commotion & Security walks in, pulls me to the side & tells me to leave. I asked him why should I when I’m the one who walked away blablabla. I get let back in & people are talking about what happened and shit. Uggghh I hate when people ask me these things because it was only a push. It’s around this point that I find out my other friends are leaving soon. There’s no way in hell I’m staying here alone and call my folks to pick me & one of my friends up. Anyway now the other kid wants to fight me but I’m not biting so I stay inside. I’m talking to some people and security lets the guy back in, he very rudely interrupts and says “Hey I wanna talk to you buddy & if your friend wants to get his ass kicked he can but I wanna talk to you” I say “We’re talking now, go ahead” and he just goes on and on about stupid shit (he’s a lil drunk too) about how I swore at him & yelled at him. I get bored of this so I turn around and walk away AGAIN.

As I’m walking he pushes me from behind. A fairly weak push that just moves me forward so I ignore it. Next he tries taking a swing at my stomach from behind! It didn’t work out as well for him (he tried punching my stomach from behind) but it was a well technique punch, and he’s still going at it. So I push him away from the side, keep walking with my back turned. Next thing I know his friend punches me in the back of the head! Before I could even turn security comes in again. Now I’m DEFINITELY getting kicked out.

But security was nice. They wanted me out for sure but not in a mean way at least. There was a huge commotion again (this was near the front where everyone was leaving) and I heard one of my buddies that I haven’t seen in 2 years giving me his support saying “Don’t fight him Pairo.”

This was a guy that I hated in gr 7. One day in the halls I took a swing at him, a teacher saw, and after some heavy talking I got suspended for 1 day. Very disorganized. That was in gr 7. I saw him there today & I was just happy to see my old friend from elementary school & he showed mutual respect. We both know & understand we were just kids & could put that aside. Since then I learnt not to fight people at school where authorities are present, then a year later I just stopped getting into fights period. They’re completely 100% useless. Some cases sure, but I have yet to encounter important enough situations for me to fight. It’s not even fun anyway. Wrestling is fun, hockey is fun, locker boxing is fun, but not fighting.

Back to the story: the kid was taken out (obviously) since he was the aggressor. His boys went with him too. They were waiting for me to come outside. Security wanted to get me out through the back & take me to Main st. And tell my rents to pick me up there. After some talk & compromising I get my friend that I’m supposed to drive & leave w/ the security guard. Sexy.

BUT WAIT THATS NOT ALL. I’m walking w/ the security (I feel so big), my boy (let’s call him JD), and myself. He takes us to a CIBC bank that has a huge sign and tells me to tell my rents to pick me up there. Then he leaves to go back and help his fellow security guard handle the situation. Me & JD are now walking towards the bank, alone. Suddenly, we hear two really loud, young looking cars approaching. I ignored it but JD is black so he has an intuition that it’s the guys from the event looking for us. I don’t think it is but it’s not worth risking at this point, since they just passed us & slowed down. I’m thinking “Oh shit!” cuz we’re alone and there’s nothing we could do since they’re coming...in TWO cars!!!

First instinct we have is to get indoors and just open the doors to the place that’s right beside us, a bank. We are in the small room by the entrance with a couple ATMs, but then second door to the inside of the bank is locked and there are clear windows, which still leaves us visible from the outside! Luckily the windows don’t go all the way to the ground, and from past movie experience, I get the instinct to get in a corner and duck, and immediately I get down with my ass down in a doggystyle position, as does JD, whose head is conveniently right by my ass! How bromantic.

But I only processed that last bit of information after I heard and saw, through the reflection of the glass, both cars speeding back. After a few minutes, nobody walks in. I call my mom & tell her to pick me up by the bank. Turns out she’s just leaving home, which means 20 more minutes like this! But I’ll take this to a pack of pissed off teens any day.

I felt bad for my friend that I got him in a situation like this, so to kill off the tension I say I’m about to fart. He takes it seriously & says it’s ok (remind you he’s a tall guy and the entrance was small, so his head is touching my ass) I smile & shift so it’s not too bad for him :)

Eventually my mom gets here. As it turns out JD and me were hiding in a Scotia Bank, which is RIGHT beside the CIBC. My excuse for them picking us up here was that there were some sketchy kids nearby and we didn’t want to get caught alone. Perfect mix of truth and lie, perfect excuse. Apparently there were some sketchy kids waiting inside CIBC... They even asked her if she was calling the police when she took out her phone to call me (which makes me feel 38294743578346x worse that they even interacted with her). Holy Shit :.

Final Thoughts:

My situation right now is a weird one. As weird as it sounds, I got into PUA to get a social life. To gain a social life that I lacked from school (I had plenty of acquaintances, just no one good to truly hangout with). That started working out pretty well, but because of PUA I couldn’t get out of pick-up mode when it came to interacting with girls. I started being a guy’s guy (not a man’s man) and had no good ladyfriends since I tried picking all of them up. This is ironic because back when I was the man, I was sad that I had too many female friends and not enough guy friends...Funny how things turned around.
But now I’m starting to relax and become more chill, and I’m starting to get closer to females, actually care about them (I didn’t for a while cuz I thought they were dumb and do nothing but steal from guys) and getting back to my old ways, mixed with a bit of the PUA Pairo. I have to say I like this combination. I really do. The only problem is that now my guy friends are guys, they don’t pick up and I could recognize that they are scared because I am educated on the topic. No way in hell I’m introducing them to this stuff.

This new combination could bring the sarging home. When I was in PUA-mode, I would do all my sarging in malls outside of my town of Markham. Now I’ve started sarging at my local mall, and this is what happened.

It really felt cool that I knew a girl whose friend I picked up. She was cute too :). There’s alot more gaming to do before I could get good, but like I mentioned before, I’ll take it like Pokémon. I’ll keep doing it, gain experience, level up, learn new moves, and evolve.

That closeness with that girl was real good too. It felt nice and every time I think about it, I swear my penis moves. But there was something intriguing about it. Last time I fingered a girl, but with her I was nowhere below her waistline, not even on her ass. My hands stayed above the waist, which is good because it shows I’m different and classy. Of course if she moved my hands down there I would finger her, but I was pretty content where I was :). I’m going back to my old ways, & it feels good.

Now the incident was weird. On the next day at school people kept asking me if I’m alright, which I absolutely hate because NOTHING even happened. Sure I took one punch in the back of the head, but that didn’t even hurt! I’m a big boy, I could take one! It pisses me off so much because in hockey, I’m not very good at body checking and as a result I’m the guy that gets checked. The big hits too. But I’m also the guy who always gets up almost immediately because I don’t want to waste my time on the ice. It pisses me off when the other players on my team ask me if I’m alright. Of course I’m alright! If I wasn’t I wouldn’t have gotten up!!

I’m also not a very good story teller, which is something I will have to fix if I’m to get good at this.

The “fight” was my first real experience like that. Apparently the guys waiting out front for me were gonna knife me (I personally never heard anything about knives or seen any that night). And apparently if most of the people there stayed that late, we would’ve had more backup & taken them. I also personally don’t care. I never got the idea of “back” and think it’s a sign of weakness that you judge how tough you are buy just knowing people that would show up to a fight. I never liked the idea of other people fighting my battles or on my behalf. We’re not fighting for land, or money, or freedom, so to me there’s no reason why more than one person can get involved.

The most unbearable thing for me was that if those guys came into our bank instead of CIBC, I would’ve hated myself if JD got beat up because of me. I don’t mind getting beat up, but other people because of me I do. In that time we were waiting for my folks to arrive I was thinking of what would happen and what I would do if they came in here. I really did have no clue. I’d do what Eminem did in 8 Mile and let them swarm me and kick me, but I wouldn’t let that happen to JD. I doubt I’ll even get myself in a situation like that again.

It feels pretty good though. I know I’m only saying that because I stood up and walked away scot-free, but it’s good to have that sense of adventure again >:). I was just there having a good time and ended up with most of the girls there. Around the end when there were less people that was clearly visible. I’m more determined than ever to soar to the top of my game now. Like I said I’m going back to my old ways (which is good) and old sparks are being rekindled inside me and my passion for things is coming back. Level up!

Even in rejection may you be triumphant,
Pairo the Fire Starter

PS. EVERYONE OUT THERE LOOK OUT FOR DARREN SHAN’S NEW BOOK HELL’S HORIZON IN STORES NOW. THANK YOU

P9: Lots of Ass, Still No Pass :(

2009-04-14T16:59:00.000-07:00

Written on: Monday February 16, 2009

Last night was fun! Let me tell you what happened.

So since my embarrassing performance at the all ages event, I didn’t do anything. Last night there was another event, my buddies have been telling me to go for a long time, had to give the people what they want :).

There was originally supposed to be 3 of us, but one backed out at the last minute (the Chinese guy from last time). His loss.

We were waiting in line for a long time. It was FREEZING outside and we were right in front of the no ticket line (:P). Eventually my boy just paid the bouncer 20$ to let us in (10 a person). TOTALLY not worth it. I didn’t wanna do it, but he paid, and my dick was gonna explode from holding in my pee for so long, so fuck that. The bouncer let us in and it was good from there. Paying off bouncers already. So happy I said I had no money :)

First thing I did inside was head straight for the washroom. I swear I peed for 2 minutes straight. It just wouldn’t stop (had a Gatorade while we were in the line up). After that we went to the dance floor, but the thing is no one was dancing.

We got in early so the place wasn’t very crowded, I’m freezing my ass off and there are like 2 girls on the dance floor and 483903728095 guys standing by the wall watching. It was like gr. 8 dance. Terrible. After a while though things started picking up but the thing is I was still freezing from outside. My boy found a girl to grind on so now I HAVE to. That’s when an idea hit.

I looked for the fattest girl I could find, went right up to her, wrapped my arms around her (almost went all the way around ;) and just started grinding...she was so warm...:D

So after a while I started heating up and I lost my buddy somewhere on the dance floor. Unlike last time, I just went up to girls and started grinding. It felt weird at first but after a while I get used to it. The trick is at first to pretend that the girl you’re going to grind on signalled you over and actually wants you to do it. If you keep doing that, eventually you’ll find that over 70% of the time they actually do. Why else are they here?

Here’s where things get intresting. At this point I grinded on about 5-8 girls. Now I went up to another one and put my hands around her waist. She finds my hands, and moves them down to her inner thighs. I move them up and rub over her pussy. She doesn’t object. So I start fingering her. On the dance floor. While we’re grinding. :)

Now my hands weren’t actually in her pants. She was wearing TNAs so it job was easier but I couldn’t go all the way in because her pants were so tight. I tried finding her clit too but there was no way of telling what I was touching...All I remember was my hands were kind of going in something and it was wet. It gets me hard just thinking about it. Ooo my first half finger fuck!

This was going on for about 3 songs and eventually her friends came and pulled her away...jealous pieces of shit. So I went to wash my hands then get back to the dance floor.

As the night kept on going I noticed other girls were moving my hands down there. But the thing is they were with friends and every time that happened they would move them. AHHH it pisses me off.

Anyway I still wanted to game girls a bit. I tried to open a few girls but they never understand what I’m saying. The music is waayyy too loud and I have to spend all my energy on speaking loud enough. I couldn’t do anything with my voice tone so sometimes my openers never even clicked. Back to the dance floor for me :).

There were a few girls that got me hard. This one girl I was grinding on was really good but the thing is I got hard and she fully felt my throbbing penis press against her ass. She talks to her friends, they laugh, and she leaves...And I have no regrets. :D

Then there was one girl I saw before and made eye contact with but never did anything. I went and grinded on her. She also moved my hands to her thighs but her friend, who was hardcore grinding on a guy beside us, said something so I settled for her thighs :(. It was really good and I wanted to kiss her so I told her to turn around and dance face to face. The thing is her tight ass dress got in the way and we couldn’t move around. After that song we stopped and it felt like we just had sex or something. We were both breathing hard and sweaty and looking at each other. I asked her for her name and number and she just coughed it up. I also asked for her age and she was 17...She asked for mine and I said 17. I really just turned 16...gotta fake it till we make it ;)

SCORE! I got a number! So there were a few more grinds and then we had to leave. We budded in line for coat check and even that took 1 hour. I talked to the girl behind me but it was purely for fun. I was way too tired & hungry to fully game her. Me and my boy got our jackets, and then left. He got 2 numbers as it turns out...but he didn’t finger anybody :D

Final thoughts:

They seriously need to do something about the girl to guy ratio. There were like 3 guys for every girl. The stupid thing about it is that most of them didn’t even do anything the whole night. Just standing by the corner and talking to their friends. WTF LEAVE. There’s no need for that. You can’t even cruise around the dance floor looking for girls there’s so many of them.

The bouncers here were cool, they knew their stuff.

Clubs are smaller than I thought. They look so much bigger when I’m watching Keys to the VIP or see pictures of them. I was shocked.

Now let’s talk about me. There was absolutely no display of game whatsoever by me. Just very skilful grinding and my super good looks. I never talked to any of them at all and still got results. I personally believe that, for any set of skills one could have, the really good people who excel are the ones who understand the basic concepts really well. I just went up to girls and started grinding. I even took control sometimes. I don’t think that’s game, but it’s a form of courage required to game. And I fingered someone.

It was a learning experience though. In there you can’t really talk or convey your personality, so a lot of it is intuition and displays of courage and confidence. The last time I went was total shit, this time it wasn’t exactly the total opposite, but I had a REALLY good time. I learnt a lot too. Next time someone wants me to finger them I’ll try moving them somewhere where their friends can’t see what we’re doing. Next time I’ll have a 2 song limit and ask girls for their number after that. Next time I might even try talking to a few when we’re grinding. The best way I could compare it is to hockey. I used to play defence (fucking amazing one too) but this year we had too many so I had to play forward. At first I was total shit (still adjusting to moving up one level), but every game I’d learn a few things forwards have to do and eventually I caught up with the others. Just like here I learnt a few new tricks and probably will learn more next time too.

Also I was having a good time. When you’re alone there, you start making guy friends. The other guys there were really open because they’re after the same thing as you. I saw this tall guy grinding on a tall blonde girl, and I saw that her friend of the same height was alone. I went up to a guy and was like “do you think I could get the really tall girl?” and he said “It’s possible” and I said “Worth a shot” so I went up to her and started grinding. Her ass was on my chest. That’s how tall she was. I guess she didn’t notice because she stayed and even picked things up a bit! I started chuckling to myself. Her friends though started laughing and they told her to turn around and she did. When she had to look down to see me the jig was up..:P

There were some really skilled women there and right now I’m having the hardest time not jacking off. I’m trying to cut back to make myself get out there and get it more..BFHREUIKHS. Now I have to text this 17 year old girl and I dunno what I’m going to say because we had absolutely no words exchanged between us. I can’t even tell her I’m “that guy from last night” because for all I know there were 20 of them...

Anyway the next event I’m going to will probably be in April or May. My parents wouldn’t let me go to EVERY single one and I’d rather lie to them when it’s really important, not for some club event.

Anyways wish me luck with this girl, I really want her bad. My testosterone is way up.

Gamers, I salute you,

Pairo

P8: My First All Ages Event

2009-04-14T16:52:00.000-07:00

If you’re wondering what’s been happening since the time of the last post here’s what: ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!

That girl I was talking about turned out to look like a clown. Brrrr!

I haven’t been out approaching or anything like that for reasons which are unknown even to me. I know that the last 3 weeks i was bombarded with homework, and I’m probably the slowest worker I know :).

So after all this nothingness I decided hey! Why don’t I go to an event!

In the dance/club environment my game is like multiplied by 10. It’s like Grubbs Grady when he steps into the Demonata. Nothing can stop me bitch. What better place than a club?

I went with one of my boys who’s this cool Chinese guy that’s cool, but no success with women. But he’s outgoing, just like me :).

So we get there at 8, wait in line for 1 hour, didn’t talk to anybody other than ourselves. Oh ya not to mention it was also freezing cold outside.

So we get in and all we’re thinking about is YEEEAAAHH KEYS TO THE VIP STYLE!! We were planning on doing 3 rounds, Introduction, Recovery, and Divide & Conquer. We got in, and we were nervous as shit!

So hey! Why not introduce ourselves to random people? Exactly what we did.

I don’t know if you’ve been, but the Republik night club is shit. There were 3 rooms, 1 pretty big one at the entrance where they played house music and euro and all that crap. Then there was a hallway, which led to a room smaller than my parents’ where they played hip hop MIXES. Not even the actual song. Wtf? That room was PACKED. There were a handful of girls dancing on the floor, another handful on a platform in the middle none of the guys can get to, and then the rest were guys trying to grind on girls. But the difference here than a school dance is that over here, girls actually make CHOICES. Can you believe that?

At school you could just go up to a girl and start grinding. Even if she doesn’t want to, she just does it uncomfortably. Here, if she doesn’t want to, she moves away or takes your hands off her waist. WTF. Me and my boy were cruising the sausage-infested area looking for girls to grind on. Looking back I don’t see why we were so nervous, but we couldn’t just go up to girls and grind. Then after circling around for the third time, we just found some moderate girls and grinded on them. Yayyy!

I got tired of that so I went by the bar thing to game girls and actually approach them like I’d do in a mall. They responded REALLY well. The problem was I couldn’t say anything else after I opened due to the fast-paced club environment. These one girls though, things were going well but then I farted and I could actually smell it...So I journeyed back into the vicious circle of cock in search of some willing-ass to grind on.

It was pretty much that the whole night. Then Danny Fernandes and some Emjay lady performed. DANNY! I was in the front 3 rows when Danny came on. One of my boy’s hot friends that he knew outside the club was there too and I wanted to dance with her. But then Danny came on and I lost her :).

It was crazy. I started in like the 6^th or 7^th row of people, and every time Danny would come close everyone rushed to grab his hand I ended up in the 2^nd or 3^rd :). He gave me props! :D

After Danny Fernandes left it was 1 am so it was time to leave for my buddy and I. He’s like “hold on” and then grinds on this super hot blonde. I’m just thinking “holly shit my man had it in him the whole time” and went off to find some girls that weren’t dancing to game :). It turns out I found one sitting alone in the hallway so I started talking to her. It was going pretty well and she was giving me the sexy wide-eyes (not the save-me eyes, I am aware of the difference). I was going to change locations with her until 2 fat ass bouncers yelled at everyone in the hall and told us to get the fuck out. Then there was a rush and I lost her :(. So I go check back on my boy, but now he’s leaning back on the wall with the girls grinding him. Wtf, I thought we were being chodes together :(!! So then I got into the tiny hip hop room looking for some girls to pick up. I see these two girls that I talked to before saying “OWWW, is it normal for a girl to brake your wrist while you’re grinding on them?”

It was a complete bullshit opener I made up on the spot. I didn’t even use it as an opener, just said it while I was walking by.

I spotted them again and asked “Are you the girls I talked to about my wrist?” and they’re like YEAH! And I say “It still hurts!” and one of them kisses her hand and rubs it on mine and says “get better soon ;)” And then they travel into the meat-circle of hip hop in search of some last-minute action. FUCK!

I go back to check on my buddy and see he’s done. I ask him “what happened” and he says “I’ll tell you later.”

So we head off to coat-check and wait in line. I see a two set and open, but then I’m interrupted by the coat check lady asking me for my ticket. She asks for there’s too and then they’re off into their own conversation. W/e. I get my sexy ass jacket and leave. Numberless.

So this was my first event. Eh, it’s a start. The bouncers were REALLY mean to pretty much everyone. I don’t blame them though. Who wants to stand around watching over a bunch of teenagers that think they’re older than they really are? But still. Adults talking down to us always kill the mood :(

So here I couldn’t grind on anyone. Most of the guys that successfully went up to girls and started grinding had a natural vibe to them. They were tall, well groomed, either gangster or gino. Me on the other hand I’m short, with acne, hanging out with a Chinese guy. If it was my school or I knew the girls in some way obviously I could’ve pulled it off. I’m still a pretty hot guy ;) with a great personality, which I can’t really convey when I’m on the dance floor looking for random girls to grind on. I’ll stick to approach, game, move, and close. None of this random grinding crap. I’m not that guy. If I was, maybe, but the thing is I’m not :).

I thought of a few really good openers to use when in an environment as such. My mind is always thinking of new openers to use. I believe in natural game, but what’s more natural than a line you thought of yourself?

Most of the kids here came in large groups of friends and usually mixed. They also know a few people once they get inside. My man and I, was not like that. Just us two, no idea what to expect. On that night, we were fishes in their sea.

Now let’s talk about the game that I DID display. EVERYTIME I approached a girl like in a mall or something I got a good reaction. If not, then a great reaction. The thing is I couldn’t hold it. Mystery and all that crap tells you not to peck and I’m thinking “Obviously don’t” and then when I got there I was doing the exact same thing! My body language was terrible. The loud music REALLY threw me off. And due to my weak body language, my holy-grail of pickup lines was not working as good as I would have hoped.

I seriously don’t get how they do it in Keys to the VIP or how adult PUAs go to clubs to game. The music is WAYY too loud. And a teen like me, almost 16, my voice is still pretty scratchy, so I can’t yell. Even if it wasn’t talking is not an easy task. I remember the “professionals” said you should amplify your voice and put more volume to it instead of shouting. Pfffft.

Other than those two factors, my approaches went pretty well. There was also another room where it was like a lounge, but after a while the bouncers wouldn’t let anyone in. Looking back now I realise it wasn’t sealed off, it could only carry a certain amount of people. I should have stayed around and waited for people to leave to go up and officially game.

When it’s all said and done it was still a new environment to me. I guess it just came at me all at once and my game was messed up. I wasn’t even walking around with purpose or anything. Usually I look cool when I walk, not on that night. Also I never approached or anything in over a month prior to last night. That could have played a role. At least I got props from Danny Fernandes.

So pretty much I got raped by the universe yet again. There were a bunch of bigger, hotter, and more accustomed guys as my competition. There’s nothing I love more than a challenge :D. I thought the girl to guy ratio would be greater, but there were alot more guys than girls. Desperate fucks.

But over the last month, even though I haven’t been going out I still feel as if my game was growing, and last night proved it. My sentences flowed more naturally and I could think of things to say in a snap. It’s not an issue for me anymore. Anyways, I will be hitting up malls soon, closing, and setting up day 2s. Finding an all-ages event to go to is easy, but going to them is hard since I live in a Toronto sub-urb. But I will make it back to another one, and I will redeem myself on that very night. I may be a fish in the sea, but I will be the fish with the most game. The fish where all the other fishes wanna find out “Hey why are all those fishes interested in that short guy with the black hair?”

I will come back though

Till then may the Venusian gods watch over me,

Pairo

P7: School Dance

2009-04-14T16:36:00.000-07:00

Written on: Saturday November 15, 2008

SCHOOL DANCE YO

I JUST GOT BACK

AND IM THE FUCKING MAN

No not really. This is how it went.

First went to school, nothing special, came back with my wingman Duke, chilled, and then got ready for the dance.

It was go time baby. We watched Whipped (great fucking movie), & some Keys to the VIP (great fucking show bitch). After that we got ready, took some shits, Numa-Numa-ed, made a prayer to the gods of Game, and bounced from this fucker.

Arrive at Dance. Things are slow. There are like absolutely barely anybody on the dance floor. This confirms my suspicions that my school is fucking lame. After a bit of debating me and some buddies decided to start this thing. Let’s start this BJ.

First girl I grinded on, stopped in the middle. Second girl I grinded on, stopped in the middle. Third was a complete song. 4^th & 5^th was ended in the middle of the song. I went to my wingman like “WTF” and then I pulled up my shirt to reveal my sexy chest. I realized my belt buckle was dead smack in the middle of my waist! After changing its position, I went back, and it was all good. Poor girls. I was hurting them :’(

After a while, when I wasn’t grinding, I was just having a good time and making jokes with some guys. I gave this guy advice, another asked for it. I was starving like fuck but there was absolutely no food. Should’ve snuck some shit in. W/e after drinking a 1$ coke (that I got for free because the lady gave me 2 toonies and a loonie for change :D) I was pumped. Grinded on some fuckers.

Last school dance (it was exactly one year ago and it was my first. Once again, proof that my school is lame) I made out with a girl. I had a rep to keep up.

This place was probably the biggest sausage fest you have ever seen. There were 582470950 guys and 473 girls. After the first 10 seconds of every song the other girls in gr 10 are taken. So me and a buddy went out and did some niners. At first I got rejected and whatever but that was because I always asked them to dance. After a while (around my first coke) I said fuck it and went up to them and grinded. It’s so much easier. At first I was uneasy but I decided to fuck it. So many girls were grinded on like that. A couple of them were uncomfortable and so I felt bad but when that happened I just said “Alright your losing me here.”

I also had a potential make-out but it turns out she had a boyfriend :(. The Mother-Hens told me this and once again, I got fucked by them. I decided to just leave and grind on other girls :D. There’s other pussy in this town.

After a while I and some boys stepped out for a while. We sat on a table, and sitting near us were these two cute east-asian girls (I don’t say asian because I’m tired of people only referring to Chinese people as Asians. I’m Persian and I’m an Asian too god dammit).

Anyways we talked for a bit. I don’t know what about. I remember telling them how the dance was a sausage fest. W/E I really clicked well with this one girl. I was being totally natural, no pickup artist in me.

Went back in and grinded some more. Eventually I checked my watch and it was 10:11 (dance ends at 10:30). I was like FUCK! So me and my buddy grinded on some foreign girls (foreign as in girls we don’t know yet; and all the girls we don’t know yet are niners). Done. Grinded on some more foreign girls. Done. Next song came on, and my buddy managed to get a girl we actually know before other guys got in there :O. So I went to look for some foreign chicks by myself man.

Guess who I found? Cute girl I was talking to in the halls earlier! I asked her if she’s that girl that was outside, she said yeah, we grinded like there was no tomorrow. But the thing is, we actually talked while we were doing it. I’ve done that before but not like this. It was an actual conversation. Since it was the end, the DJ played a slow song. We held each other (I’m no giant, but this girl was really short.)

Fellas, another compliance test you can do is when you’re slow dancing, try gently holding her tighter. If she does the same, then you’re in ;). Another tip is to let the music guide you; you don’t have to dance in a circle.

Anyways it ended, she asked me for her number. Now it’s coming back to me what we talked about before. I told her how I’m Asian too and said that I’m Persian. Her eyes literally lighted up when I said that. It turns out her friend really likes Persian guys and I guess she wanted to see what the fuss was about. I have no idea why she’s attracted to Persians (because some girls think of 300 when they hear the word Persian) but she was. I guess it’s our natural aura ;)

So now the dance was over and we were holding hands and walking. I wanted to get a kiss close before the night ended. I told her the halls were really crowded and we left. Guys kept on talking to me and girls kept on talking to her. When they saw our hands they fell silent. It was so cute :)

Anyways I took her to a corner. It wasn’t the most private place but the best it would get. I saw this thing on Keys to the VIP where the guy tells the girl that she has very interesting full lips and he does too. Then they make out :D. I tried doing that, but she wasn’t buying it. I’ll talk about it later.

So after that we went back to the front, I dropped her off with her friends, went to see my boy Duke, turns out he got a number too. His very first number close :’) We went home and it was a night.

From now on I’m going to start grinding on girls, screw asking them. It makes absolutely no sense.

I have to get my mother-hen game settled. I must learn to evade the cock block. They are destroying me. So far it’s 2-1 them. I HATE FUCKING MOTHER HENS. I HOPE THEY ALL FUCKING DIE. THEY DON’T CALL ME PAIRO FOR NOTHING BITCH. Girls are so jealous. But so far, all the mother hens have said it me is “Omg you have a boyfriend!” Hmmmm. Next time I’m going to ask them if they’re single. This way if the girl is interested she could answer the question and not the hen. This is difficult to go by. I’m going to have to be extra creative to come up with a solution for this one.

Now with that girl and the kiss, I realized something. Before, I was being totally natural and chill and we clicked. Now when I used this line from someone else it sucked. Screw lines, it’s all about natural game. OMG HOLLY SHIT. I just realized that now I have a girlfriend. Sweet!

I don’t believe in relationships (too much bullshit involved). I don’t like texting people back and forth and setting up dates. It’s so awkward for me. But trust me, at this age it’s really hard to get anywhere with a girl unless your “boyfriend girlfriend”. And besides, I kinda like this girl so really I don’t mind. I want to be her man. Now I understand more about relationships. I never believed in that shit but now I do.

OMG IM GONNA SEE JAMES BOND WITH HER :D. Oh ya if anyone has any date ideas, please tell me. I don’t like asking a girl to the movies, too cliché. Setting up the date would probably be my biggest challenge. But it ain’t a thang to a G.

Having a good time is fun. I love it. I was soo pumped and hyped. I even said to a girl “It’s ass-time” and she grinded on me. I didn’t really mean for her to do it (I was just joking,) but w/e. I love having a good time. I can’t wait to go clubbing. ANYONE WHO WANTS TO COME PLEASE MESSAGE. I wanna see the environment in clubs. At a dance there really isn’t that much room for talking. Maybe it’s different in a club? Who knows.

I love having a good time and I love being natural. My game is at a point where I could ditch all this crap. I hate the word “pick up artist.” I hate hate hate it. It’s sooo stupid because it’s all about natural game. Lines don’t mean shit. It’s how you say it. Obviously the fundamentals are important to learn (cocky comedy, how to open, IOIs, DHV’s, etc). But once you learn that it’s easy. I still have a bit of work to do to break out of this “Pick Up Artist” shell and be a free pimp.

And there’s proof of that when I tried kissing her. She could smell it from a mile away and it made absolutely no sense for me to say that line. Next time I’m going to talk to her, NATURALLY, and then eventually I’ll hint a little sexuality. Then maybe I could go into that line. Or at least talk about something related to that. OMG. When I told her I’m Asian, she was like ME TOO! And then I said “OMG we have so much in common!” When we were in the corner I could’ve been like “Lets think of other things we have in common” blablabla and eventually when we’re having a good time, I’ll get into that thing about her lips. Maybe next time.

Sarging (I hate that word) is going to have to be put on hold. I tried sarging with a girlfriend before. I didn’t feel like I was cheating but it just felt weird. And besides, I really like this chick and I actually do want to get to know her better. Pfft and I thought me and Chinese girls don’t click.

Anythings possible playa, just have a good time and do you. All you need is Pick Up to point you in the right direction, and then I’m pretty sure you can “pick it up” from there ;)

Peace and may the Venusian Gods be with you,

Pairo

P6: "What's in the Bag?"

2009-04-14T16:16:00.000-07:00

Written on:Friday November 14, 2008

I bet you all wanna know what I did for Halloween right?

Well actually not because very few people actually visit this site, but don’t worry because nothing special happened.

I don’t know enough people for parties and I decided it wouldn’t be best if my very first ever all ages club event was a Halloween event. Maybe next year.

Now though, I have a bunch of club websites so I could easily find out about events. There’s one tomorrow but that’s the day of my SCHOOL DANCE :D. There’s also another one on December 13 at the Govurnment, December 23^rd at CiRCa, and again December 28^th at Luxy Club. If anyone wants to go with me feel free to msg.

Anyways, I had a lot of homework and a lot of hockey, so I couldn’t find enough time to sarge. On Saturday I went, but my fire died down by then and I couldn’t approach (didn’t have that much time anyway.) I went again on Monday (P.A. Day). My wingman couldn’t come (again) and so I had to approach alone. I kept on getting blown out. It was fun. Until I met my very first mother-hen.

She killed me. She devoured me. She raped me in the ass, shoved a pen up my cock and left me there sobbing. It was terrible :’(

Okay maybe not but she still fucked me pretty bad! I approached this 2-set of girls in front of me, walked ahead of them, listened a bit to what they said until one of them said “fuck,” and that’s my queue.

I’m serious right when one of them said fuck I turned around and told them not to use that kind of language with me. Then we kept on saying fuck to each other until the mother hen asked me “who are you I don’t even know you?” I tell her my name is Prince Charming, and then her really hot blue-eyed friend dilated her eyes and opened her mouth like she was about to take in a can-sized cock and exclaimed “OMG! I’m Princess Lula!” At this point the mother hen says “Okay I’m walking ahead” and speeds up, I wrap my arm around Princess Lula and say “So Princess,-” but I couldn’t get anywhere because I was interrupted by this stupid coq-block shouts back “You have a boyfriend! Omg don’t even try anything stupid just leave!” and obviously the hot girl chooses her friend over me.

Right in front of the whole mall too. This was a one-strip mall so all she shop keepers now know me as the guy who got shot down. Thanks a lot ho.

I decided that mall was done for me after that, went to Promenade, saw a guy from my hockey team, left, went back to Hillcrest, and saw this other guy that used to go to my school. At this point it was 6:30 and I had to leave if I wanted to make it back to watch PRISON BREAK. So I came back home numberless.

Looking back at that last approach, instead of saying “hey don’t use that language around me” I could have said “Hey, I noticed you said the word fuck and I couldn’t help but come over here and talking to you. Whenever a cute girl needs me like that I have to respond. What’s your name?” or spin it around to something sexual like that. The possibilities are endless.

Now today is Wednesday. Tomorrow’s my school dance. You know I gotta get my shit together. My wingman does too. Lucky for him, he was able to join me on this marvelous occasion.

We arrive at Markville Mall. Lots of hunnies, but I am just plain STARVING. We order Taco Bell, eat, and then I decide I have to take a shit real bad. This was happy hour too.

By the time I’m done, there are practically no more sets left. We’re walking around this empty mall with absolutely no one in sight. Until we see a juicy two-set of blondes :D

My boy Duke is up first. He goes direct on their ass, but then chodes out when he realizes he actually knows them. FUCK MARKVILLE! But something good came out of it. He realizes him knowing them could have played to his advantage rather than a handicap. Maybe next time bro.

So we continue to walk around and guess who we see?

A few posts back I mentioned something about opening the can and talking to the hottest girl at my school. She was there :). But I kept on getting her name wrong (on purpose I wanted to see how well it works). Immediately, our first instinct is to run like little pansies. But not today.

Instead we decide to hide and create a plan of attack. Originally I wanted to go up to her (my buddy doesn’t know her) and pretend that I was going to pick her up and had absolutely no idea that I already knew her. Until a 3 set comes by.

Now instead I decide to use my holly-grail of pick up lines, talk to the 3 set first, possible numbers close them, and then head off to Hottie McFottie so that she sees me getting girls. The only problem is that the 3 set is ordering from the fucking Yogen Fruiz stand. Once they’re done, they decide to sit RIGHT in front of the hot girl. Now we can’t go talk to the hot girl because we’re not that good friends and I can’t engage the three set because if it goes horribly wrong the hot girl will bear witness. I decide to pretend I’m talking on my phone and head out of our hiding place with our dignity in tact. Sort of…

This mall is really boring. Absolutely no action comes our way. We are tired and my wingman is carrying a sling bag. That’s some tiring shit. So he offers me to wear it for him. Aww what a gentlemen!

But seriously, him asking me to carry the sling bag just makes me that much more in love with him. Because that is when the stroke of genius comes in. I just came up with an opener.

Of course now I’m 20x more determined to test out my new opener. It’s fucking brilliant. I’m walking on the lower floor until I spot the three set previously ordering at Yogen Fruiz sitting on a bench upstairs. I walk upstairs, head to the girls, and use my newly-made opener for the first time:

Pairo: “Hey, I’ll give you $5 if you could guess what’s in this bag” (Hold the sling bag)

Hot Babe: “Well, could we feel it?”

Pairo: “Sure”

(Hot Babe & Moderate Friend feel the bag like it’s a sac of balls)

Hot Babe: “Is it a bag?”

Pairo: “A bag in a bag. You guys are smart.”

Moderate Friend: “I feel a pencil. Is it a pencil?”

Pairo: There could be a pencil in there but what’s the main thing?”

(Hot babe talks on cellphone out of nowhere)

Moderate Friend: “Well can you tell us what’s in it?”

Pairo: “I’ll tell you what. You guys are pretty cute; so why don’t you give me your number and I’ll call you and tell you what’s in the bag.”

Hot Babe: (Intrigued and no longer on her phone) “How old are you?”

Fatty who has up until now remained silent: “Stephanie! You have a boyfriend!”

Hot Babe (Stephanie): “Alright we’ll give you our facebooks okay?”

Pairo: “Alright”

….aaaand done.

Now obviously the interaction didn’t go exactly like that but the opener generally worked in that way. We also made small talk about what high school they go to. After they gave me their names on my cellphone, I left and they asked me right before I leave if I’m going to tell them what was in the bag. I said no.

Looking back, I should have said “Well do you want me to be completely honest?” and they would say yes at this point. Then I say “I have no clue ;)” and shoot them a wink. It would have been a lot smoother but hey, why do we go out in the field? To learn.

I also came up with a couple other openers. Now I’m back in the habbit of going out and picking up chicks. I have a pretty good collection of openers and can’t wait to use them. I loooove picking up chicks. And I seem to be getting the “You have a boyfriend” card a lot! Looks like I’ll have to be extra vigilant with the next one.

Till then have fun guys,

Pairo

P5: Making Improvements...Sorta

2009-04-14T15:47:00.000-07:00

Written on: Thursday October 23, 2008

It’s been a long long time my friends. I missed you guys :’(.

Anyways I haven’t gone out too much recently, but I DID go out on Monday, with my wingman, and choded out.

Before we hit the Promenade Mall, we stopped by at my house, I dropped off my bag, and left. By the time we had caught the bus, it was already 4:00 (we have to leave at 6).

And guess what else; when we got there, it was 5. But hold on, that’s not all. First we stopped to eat, and you know that takes time :)

It was getting time to leave, and I saw a two-set at the food-court. Major AA (you know what it’s like on that first approach). We sat down and discussed our plan of attack. I wanted to go direct; but my wingman wanted me to whip out my holy-grail of pickup lines. I refused saying it was only meant for really hot girls & emergencies (it works like every time). Also, part of the reason why is because I’m going for more of a natural game. What I’ve noticed is that every time a girl shocks me, I chode out and start acting well, chody again. I realized that although I’m picking up chicks, I haven’t changed one bit. So no more pickup lines from me (unless I came up with them). I wanted to go direct. We’re about to go, and then I stop because I’m nervous. Then when we look back, one of them is on the phone. So we sit down, and right when she gets off, she starts talking to some guy she knows at the food-court. Life sucks. That’s why I hate sarging in sub-urban malls. It’s the pickup artist’s ghetto I tell you.

So we left. But that was Monday.

I failed to mention that I also sarged again on Wednesday. My wingman couldn’t join me so I went out alone. I decided to hit Hillcrest Mall (again) since I was alone, because Promenade was too big and there was always the possibility I could run into someone I know. I got there at around 5-ish and I noticed I’m letting sets just pass me by. I go to the washroom, collect myself, and then step outside again. But, this time I’m on my cellphone trying to get a hold of my wing to get me in a talkative mood.

Now brace yourselves, because here’s the genius part:

When I can’t get him, I stay on my phone, PRETENDING I’m on it :D. I see a nice HOT two-set open them with my cell in one hand. After a while, I start talking on it again and say “Alright buddy I’m going to have to let you go, you’re costing me money.”

Now of course after that I was too overwhelmed from not sarging in a while that I realize I didn’t have anything to say, so I patted one of them on the shoulder and kept on walking.

This is a tiny mall. Its only one strip. I’m walking back and forth and keep on seeing the same three-set of 2 guys and a girl. One of them had a Mohawk. As I was walking by them for the 10^th time, Mohawkman says “Look at the fag walking again.”
Obviously I was pissed off but I strongly believe in walking away. I do a bit of kickboxing and I’m pretty fit, so I’m confident I could take most people. But I’m a lover, not a fighter :).

I remember seeing a two-set at the food court talking to each other. I was done for the night and had to leave to make it to my hockey practice. I’m thinking of opening them with “OMG I’ve been walking around the mall all day looking for cute girls to talk to, but this mall is so tiny. I can’t believe I finally found some.”

As I’m creeping my way over to the food-court, I spot another 2set exiting a store. One of them was looking back at me, we made eye-contact, then she turned, looked back again, and started talking to her friend. I, being the opportunist that I am started speeding up my walk, got in front of them, and approached.

I said “Hey why were you guys checking me out back there?” They smiled and said that I looked like someone they knew. I replied with “Let me take a wild guess, your dreams?” and I started walking backwards in front of them and talking. I realized I was giving them the value, so I stopped, and they stopped :). I had passed the hook point long ago.

So we talked for maybe 30 seconds, I showed them my boxers, and then I whipped out that line I was going to use on the other 2set that was no longer there. They were like “Well you found some right here,” smiled, and looked like the most adorable bisexuals ever. We would’ve made a hot threesome. After that I say “okay well I have to go right now but here, put your NUMBERS (notice the plural) in my phone.” Handed them my cell and they took their turns putting it in. I say “okay well hugs all around” (quote to JLarge I think) and I hugged both girls simultaneously. I look over one girl’s shoulder, and see the guy with the Mohawk eating with his sausage-infested set staring at me. I shot him a grin, and walked away.

TO BE CONTINUED….

Let’s break it off here. Let’s not talk about Monday, nothing more said. Let’s talk about last night when my game grew.

After not sarging in so long, I forgot what it feels like to get passed that first set. I don’t know about you, but now when I go out I only get AA when approaching the very first viable set. After that I’m Golden. Now that I remember what it’s like, I won’t waste time anymore time.

I really like the direct opener. Back in the day, when I started out, I never liked direct or opinion. My first opinion opener that I ever used (which is my holy-grail of pickup lines) went EXCELLENT. They were rambling on and on and on. Of course I was too chode to transition (still am). Now I did my first somewhat direct opener, and it just cut through all the crap. It like sliced right through it.

I enjoyed incorporating the cell phone in that first set. It didn’t go well but I feel like that’s definitely something I could work with. Next time I’ll say “Okay sexy you’re eating up my minutes I’ll talk to you later.” Or something similar. I really want to experiment with this.

It’s amazing how my voice tenses up after an abstinence of speaking. When approaching that 2set I had terrible posture AND a weak voice. I think that’s a huge part of why they weren’t as invested in me as I had been in them. I don’t know if it was because I was exhausted, cold, hungry, and lonely; or if I was just being a chode. But it doesn’t matter because it sure as hell won’t be happening again anytime soon.

Also I mentioned in one of my previous posts how I approached a girl from behind, she was scared shitless and told me to talk to someone else. Ya I fixed that problem long ago by walking in front and then turning over the shoulder. I opened a 3set of ugly-but-trying-to-look-hot girls in such. I was talking to them over the shoulder the whole time. Now I have to find a way to get them walking with me or similar. I learnt that you could go either two ways with that: 1 is walk backwards and face them, then once you feel comfortable stop and see what happens OR 2 you can say “why are you guys so far back? Move up a bit” and this leads them from there. I’m going to try one of those 2 things for next time (whichever I find would work best in the situation).

I also learnt that if she challenges you, you challenge her. For example with that 3set I opened I asked them if cute guys normally talk to them. One of them said “yeah all the time.” And then something something but she asked me why I’m not walking with anyone. Instead of choding out, I could have said “Where’s your army of cute guys that always talk to you?” It’s so easy, just like that.

It’s so easy finding new techniques and fixing what you did wrong. You can only learn so much from every time you go out. Honestly, I am surprised there wasn’t a Mystery sooner. All it takes is going out, talking to girls, see where you could improve, and then try it out for next time. All Mystery did was give it all fancy names. But I still love him because he and all these other guys speed up the process so much :).

Anyways, tomorrow is a PA Day. My wingman’s coming out. You know some shit’s going down bro.

Now back to my other story:

I being my strut away from the hot babes. Tired, cold, hungry, and alone, yet that core essence resides deep inside me, and despite my physical condition, it keeps me shining brighter than any star in the galaxy. I see the door, I see the light. The sun. I let it shine through the glass pane of the exits, – exits?- shining upon me, giving my body heat and a brand new sense of self. I see it; and I’m going in. I’m walking into the light, towards the light, into the abyss. I’m going, I’m going. A new world, a new beginning, and a new life lie beyond those doors. I have only heard about it and up until now I could only imagine what it would feel like in my wildest dreams. Now all it takes is a step. One giant leap from this world to the next. The light is so unknown, but feels so friendly. No more procrastinating, there is no time to savour such allure. Only time to absorb the grace and move on. I couldn’t be happier that my marveling must come to an end. I walk in. I step forward. I have entered the Nimbus.

Until next time my friends keep on sarging,
Pairo

P4: A Chode No More

2009-04-14T15:35:00.000-07:00

Today I met up with my wingman. I’m in a pretty shit mood right now so I’ll just write down what happened.

We go to Markville after school. I hate that mall more than anything in the world. Every time I go there I see someone I know.

Me and my wing get there at around 4. People are still in school so we head out to the food court. I see a nice 3 set from the distance. After discussing what our plan will be, me and him set off for the luscious set of 3. Just as we’re nearing them, the blonde gets up, I’m thinking “Wtf?!?!” and then next thing I know she runs up to me and gives me a hug. It’s my buddy from grade 8 that I haven’t seen in over a year!... Great. I love that girl a lot (as friends and I used to be “popular” back in the day). The thing is every time I’m in shock, I chode out. Meaning I forget all the mindsets I have laid out or at least tried to lay out and go back to my natural, chody, nerdy, value-seeking ways. This is when worlds collide; and it fucking sucks. I try to keep the pick up world away from my school world. I should have expected it since I’m going to Markville. After a vey short chat, we split up. A VERY short chat with few things exchanged. I hate this.

So that was the first, only viable set in the mall so far. After getting blown out a couple of times, I whip out the holly-grail of pick up lines I have in store. One EYE (I spell eye to put emphasis on the I) created myself. Pick up a gr 12. She doesn’t know I’m in grade 10. W/e I’ll take care of that when I call her.

No ones at the mall. This sucks. I feel like I’m living in a Pick-Up Artist’s ghetto. The hours are long, very few customers, little to no money, all the numbers we get we blow out. And they even cut off our transportation to get to other malls (Viva buses are still on strike). Life sucks. We decide to approach 10 girls in 9 minutes. My wingman goes for the older ones. Asking to go to the washroom. W/e. Midway through we spot this brown kid we know :O.

The asshole stays with us so we just decide to leave. Since I can’t get any solid approaches down, I decide to experiment with picking up girls with their moms. Find a nice juicy pair, open, engage the mom, who then drags her daughter away after saying her piece. I know what to do to improve for next time now.

Next the three of us are walking around to leave. I see a nice 3 set sitting on a bench. I’m about to approach, until I see it’s the same girl I knew before. I didn’t want her to see me like this. I turn around and run away like a little bitch. The other two chodes are slow, but they eventually follow. We gather and go away. I look over my shoulder and see the girl staring at me from afar. The torn-between-chode-and-pickup-artist side of me takes hold and I wave her goodbye. Leave the mall. Never look back.

Only we exited through the wrong doors. We had to go to my wingman’s house to retrieve my schoolbag I left there prior to reaching the mall. We walk through the food court to the exit. I see the backside of the girl I picked up earlier, ordering food; except only this time she was with 2 or 3 mean-looking grade 12s. One of them sees me and shoots me the coldest look. I wouldn’t be surprised if he came over and said something to me. But then again I only seem to be surprised when it comes to picking up women.

The prick keeps on screwfacing me until I exit. I think I just picked up his girlfriend.

It doesn’t matter because I’m the shit. My name’s Pairo the Fire Starter, I’m the Dirty Pers, 15, smart, good looking, athletic, and kind. Nothing can stop me. Nothing.

The reason I feel like crap is because of the girl I saw earlier that I knew. She was the alpha-girl of my old school. I love her to death, we have history. I don’t care what other people think, but it’s just odd. I’m not the same as before. And I miss having friends like her. Actual lady-friends. Instead of “Pickup this” or “pick up that.” To be honest I feel a little sad that my life has come to this. The main reason I’m so determined into this is because before I haven’t had any real cool friends that I liked to go hang out with. I discovered the community and eventually decided this is the way to go with my life. There was no more having fun, going to the movies, or anything like that. All I have is straight pickup.

My wingman isn’t making things easier either. His parents are really strict and he doesn’t have as much a drive for pick-up as me. I think that’s because I had to introduce him to the life and sort of made him tag along with me. Obviously he’d want to learn to pick up girls, but he didn’t come to that by himself. As far as his behavior in school goes it’s still pretty chody and he’s only gaining knowledge, not putting it to good use. I’m always the one who has to open the girls. I ask him if he wants the next one, he says no. His parents are at home 24/7 and that makes it much harder for him to study this stuff online, but it’s still an excuse for a much bigger problem.

That girl has inspired me. For now, we’ll call her Lady X. When I saw her and had only my wingman, I felt odd. Her and her sister, I love them both. Her sister’s was the first boob I ever touched. I want them to see the changes I’m making and the way I could actually pickup girls. But the thing is I choded out when we talked. And I find that is a consistent problem with me. Whenever I talk to girls, and they say something unexpected, the chode takes control of me and my actions. This is a clear indicator that I still don’t have that core change of a true Venusian Artist. Although I can pick up girls, I feel that is only with my holly-grail of pickup lines. The holly spirit of pick up is in me, but it still hasn’t taken control yet. So from now on I’m never looking at any pick up lines. No more “gambits,” no more routines. Just me, what I have already learnt what I’ve already created, myself, and a bunch of women. I’m going to do more sarging by myself, definitely more closing, set up an actual day 2, and hopefully, depending on where that goes, pick up from there. I’m tired of pick up, and I’m tired of these lines. So many other teens get into this, sarge, get a good response, and then leave. Nothing else from that. Yeah its fun and I could completely understand that, but all that work and courage you mustered up for the pickup is useless if it doesn’t go anywhere beyond the approach. More approaches, more solid game, and more day 2s. That’s the principle I believe in, and that’s what I’ll stick with from now on. I’m done with pick up and now it’s time to do my own thing after all these years of exile. Hell, the grade 7 version of me would make a better pick up artist. At least HE knows what he’s doing. I’ve been waiting so long and now I’ll shine once again.

I hope to see you guys again soon, because I’m done with pick up. Its all natural from here.

Thank you for listening,

Pairo

P3: Open the Fucking Can

2009-04-14T14:21:00.000-07:00

Written on: Friday October 3, 2008

Yesssss today was filled with fun :D

My school game is ill yo. I could now go up to anyone (the girlies especially) and say whatever I want and joke around with them. I’m a HoT Boy bITcH.

Alright I’m gonna speed this up a bit.

Soo today I haven’t gone sarging in a while. Viva buses are on strike. My wingman can’t join me. I’m busy the rest of the week. I walk home. Turn on the computer to check the bus schedules. My computer crashes like 3 times. Too much porn. Must delete. After the 4^th time I remember what one of my good hockey teammates once said to me in the change room.

This guy is a natural and I use him as an example when these PUAs are talking about being dominant and all that crap. He’s got this HB9 gf that he apparently part takes in sexual activities with 5 times a week. Recently he cheated on her and then made up with her. One guy asked him “Why the fuck would you cheat on her if you’re doing her 5 times a week??!” and my good man was like “I need new pussy once in a while. You can’t eat from the same can of tuna everyday. That shits disgusting! Sometimes you need a new can. Open the fucking can.”

I remembered him saying “open the fucking can” and I realized I’m just stalling. I decided to open the fucking can by leaving my house RIGHT then and there to catch the next bus (which could have arrived in 30 minutes for all I know). Got out, bolted to the stop, and RIGHT when I got there the bus came. Get on. The HOTTEST girl at my school that barely talks to other guys (she talked to me once to ask me if I’m Persian, she is too) and she’s the girl me and my wingman joke about picking up. She’s on the bus and I say “hey” and sit down across from her. We have a nice conversation, DHV’d, blablabla and got off. Now I’m in and next time I see her at school I can talk to her. I truly believe I am on the verge of opening the can.

I take a 58964056 minute bus ride to go to Hillcrest Mall, which is a tiny mall AND not to mention its freezing at this point (forgot to take a sweater on my way out). I get to the mall, get in, procrastinate, get a bite to eat, and finally decide to approach.

The very FIRST girl I approach is Asian, and as I’ve mentioned before I don’t click well with them. Whatever, the girls are scarce so I open. I start with that “Cute Butt” opener I used last week (it was the first thing that popped in my head), and as I was saying “cute butt”, this fatass cockblocking cuntlicking female mall cop comes up to me and says:

Officer: Can I help you with something?

Me: No, I was talking to her.

Officer: Well she was walking in the opposite direction and you stopped her.

Me: Oh okay (I’m a PUA bitch!) so I’m not allowed to talk to people? I get it. (Don’t want any trouble)

*Turn to leave*

Officer: Get back here. Why were you saying that to her (I want to lick your firecrotch Pairo)??

Me: It was a genuine question (she caught me right when I said “cute butt”)

Officer: Okay well you’re not allowed to do that at this mall. Everyone minds their own business. Next time I catch you, you’re going to get booked for trespassing.

Me: Get the fuck out my face ho.

*Leave*

FUCK THA POLICE!!!!!!! MUTHAFUCKAZ CAN’T STOP A RILL G!!!! MUTHAFUCK YALL!!!! BITCH WHAT THE FUCK THEY GON DO>!??!1?!!?

That bitch was THE biggest cockblock I’ve ever seen. Like now I know what all these Pick Up Artists mean when they tell you to “befriend the fatty”

So that really shook me up and was uncertain about approaching again (fag asshole cop). This was a small mall (like 1 strip) so she could easily pop up out of nowhere with a donut in 1 hand and handcuffs in another (she clearly wanted to fuck me). I wanted to leave anyway so I head out to the bus stop.

But guess what happens? Once I get out, it starts POURING rain, no not even rain, HALE and I run for cover. I wait for a while for it to cool down, it doesn’t. Its freezing, I’m in a t-shirt, fuck that I’m going back in.

I make a run for the entrance, taking hail on my back. I make a sharp turn and get there. And there she was.

I see the cutest girl ever against the wall. The wind was blowing the hail in one direction and she was untouched by it. She had brown hair done up in a nice, well curved pony tail. In one hand she bared a cigarette. I looked; she smiled and said, “Hey.” Lovestruck, I said “Hi” and, like a chode, went back inside.

Looking back I should’ve stayed and asked her for a puff. I don’t usually smoke (maybe 1 cigarette every 3 months) but today I was having a pretty crappy day and couldn’t think of anyone better to share a smoke with :). It’s a shame.

Back to the real world, now I’m stuck at the mall. I walk by one of those suit stores that only sell men’s suits. In there I see the cutest HB20-something years old ever. I think to myself “That would be soo cool if I just went in there all wet and said ‘Hey, I just wanted to say I think your pretty cute.’” I was obviously nervous and kept on walking, but then I thought, “no, I’m the fucking man. I’m making soo much progress by doing what I think”. And then I say to myself, “Balls, balls, balls, balls!” and couldn’t resist the urge to go in. FOR BALLLSS!!! I said my thing. She smiles and laughs really hard. Aww I just made her day :).

So then I finally decide to leave, get to the exit, and then I see this girl that resembles HBCigarette-in-the-rain. I ask her if she’s the cute girl with the cigarette. She said no, but I told her she was cute anyways :). I’m such a charmer! We have a nice conversation for a while until her ride comes and she leaves. Didn’t really get anything out of it but whatever.

I wait for the bus and see a 3set heading to the mall. One of them had monster tits. This random guy walks by me and says “Yo, that girl over there is RACKED.” I think “I should approach” but then I’m too pussy and cold to do it. She was RACKED though, and the next time I see a woman in her 20s or below, that is very much racked, I will approach in honour of that man. May my aim be true.

Peace and Love,

Pairo

P2: My Careers Presentation

2009-04-14T14:15:00.000-07:00

Written on: Monday September 9, 2008

Okay real quick entry here. So today I did a presentation for my careers class. I was totally unprepared (so was half the class), so I improvised

I don’t know if you’ve taken Careers, but it’s probably the gayest thing ever. You spend a bunch of time writing down your “strong personality traits & weaknesses” your “characteristics” and your little “values.” I hate it. My teacher isn’t making it any better either. And on top of that the course is in French. Bummer!

Well anyways the presentation requires me to write down 5 of my traits/values/interests (in a nice detailed manner mind you). Then we need to pick out an object that describes ourselves and those traits. I didn’t really have anything planned, so I used a bottle of Old Spice (best deodorant ever).

Last year I’d probably bomb the speech. And most students this time did. I on the other hand have extra-sharp pickup artist skills, so this shit doesn’t bother me at all because I’m totally chill & naturalJ. I was a bit nervous actually, but not nearly as much as the other kids. It was my first real presentation ever since I got into this Pickup stuff (started in the summer).

I described the Old Spice as friendly, confident, calm, money, and hockey. Its friendly because when you spray it, it attaches to other people. It’s confident because you put yourself out there. It’s calm because your in control. Now the money part got me. So I asked the class if they’ve heard of the English expression “you’re money”. It doesn’t matter because I still said the Old Spice was “money” in my French speech as I was being rudely interrupted by my asshole of a teacher, Mme Fucktard. And finally Old Spice is hockey because after I play hockey, I spray it :). I talked about how Old Spice was also a long-standing company and how my Grandpa used to use it back in the day and how that translates to how I love the economy.

And then I got into my “personality colour.” My colour is “green” which means I like gathering intelligence and sharing it with other people. Apparently green also signifies that I enjoy solitude, which I obviously don’t. I mentioned that as the speech was winding down. I said “My personality colour is green and so is the Old Spice,” (the colour of it was green) “I like gathering intelligence and sharing it. But the thing is I HATE solitude. And this is what I think of solitude.” I start spraying the can. Omg!!!! The class erupts laughing. Then I cooled down and said in a serious and inspirational voice “My name is Patrick Rousta (it’s a fake name) and this was my Personal Wheel (name of project)” and the whole class began clapping. They never clapped for any of the other presentations. Even the good ones.

I think I was DHV’d a lot. But that wasn’t because I made everyone laugh. Every half ass pickup artist knows that doing that in front of a class is not a big deal. I’m not saying go screw up your presentation; I’m saying have the balls to do something different for it. I was loved and admired by dozens of hormone-driven teens because I was sure of myself and stuck by it. When you’re presenting, you know you’re nervous. You could feel it. There’s no fooling yourself there. But you have to have the ability to rise above that sense of nervousness and anxiety and push forward for that perfect speech. Hell, even walk around a bit. Don’t shake, don’t stutter, don’t look down unless you’re reading, and speak with a strong confident voice. That’s all it takes and you’re gold. Really, it’s not a big deal.

Thank you for reading & Happy Sarging,
Pairo

P1: Getting the Ball Rolling

2009-04-14T14:04:00.000-07:00

**Note: This blog entry was written on Friday, the 28^th of September, 2008

Okay, my first entry. Aren’t you excited? I am :).

Anyways, I just came back from Markville Mall, it was my first time going out after a 2 week hiatus (I went out on a Friday, then the Friday after that I got sick, and now today was a P.A. Day so there was no school :D)

Now I was originally intending on meeting my wingman Dub D at the mall at 12:30, but then he calls me up beforehand and said that he can’t at 12:30, so let’s make it 1:30 :D Okay and then he call me up AGAIN and says he had to take a shower (little wuss he is) and asks for 2 o’clock. At least he’ll be money when we get there. I say yes because I already scheduled my whole day with this guy AND I’m desperate for some sarging. Lately I’ve been noticing my school game just plummet downwards over the last week. I wonder if girls feel the same about guys and having “boyfriends”? Hmm

So anyways I miss the bus I was supposed to take and get to the mall at 2:30. At first it’s pretty slow so we decide to go to the food court and get something to eat. Plus, the food court is ALWAYS filled with cute girls (I guess they like to eat?). I finished eating my Taco Bell and see this blonde sitting with her friend. Me, being the Pick Up Artist that I am, decided to approach them when I’m done. I started walking (huge AA at this point) and used this “Cute Butt Opener” that I just recently collected (I’m a strong believer in natural game but it just didn’t click for me out in the field):

Me: Hey I was talking to my buddy about butts and how when we see a girl with a nice butt we tend to stare. I was wondering, well actually I know, whether or not girls do the same to guys?

Girl: Blah
Me: So if I continued walking that way, you would probably be checking out my ass.

And continue from there.

I did that and they said they only cared about the guy’s face. I told them they were boring and they started giggling. Cute :)

It didn’t go anywhere, but at least it got things rolling. After that I felt totally comfortable approaching everybody I saw. And that’s exactly what I did. I noticed the girls at this mall seem a little younger and less energetic than the ones at Promenade Mall, which is where I usually go. Markville Mall is much closer to my house, but then every time I go there I see at least 2 or 3 people I know so I tend to avoid it. I like Promenade better, but the Viva Buses (it’s like public transit on steroids) are on strike so I’m stuck here.

I was walking around with my wingman looking for targets when we see a nice 2 set walking in front of us. I really wanted to approach them but my buddy said not from behind. I already knew that but I thought I could pull it off, so me, being the naturally outgoing person that I am, went behind them, but both my hands on their shoulders, and turned them into me a bit totally assuming value, and I opened. They got scared and told me to go talk to someone else. I started laughing so hard when they said that. I believe that if you don’t get slapped in the face, shut down, utterly rejected, or feel ashamed after you do something really stupid every once in a while, you are obviously not trying hard enough. At least I tried.

Next me and my buddy started feeling a little down and tired so we decided to do this thing we saw in a video on Mypuajourney.com where we approach 9 sets in 10 minutes. He went first, did it; I went second, did it. When I went up I’d try to use a variety of openers to test them out. After 7 minutes things started getting slower, but then there was this thing I’ve always wanted to say to women ever since I’ve heard it, and have full confidence in this opener.

Now I don’t know if you know but Mystery had a TV show called The Pickup Artist where he trains guys and eliminates them one at a time to find a MPUA (great fucking show). One of Mystery’s wingmen on the show’s name is Jdog and he’s got this somewhat deep British accent. He’s out in the field and says to women “You can be my sugarmommy.” I’ve pretty much got a man-crush on him but fuck that, he’s fucking Jdog! I’ve been saying that line joking to myself for sooo long I just had to try it.

I went up to these Asian girls and said it in my pretty accurate impression of Jdog. When I walked away they bursted out laughing. I still had a few approaches to do so I said it to the next girl I saw and she was also Asian and alone. She didn’t say anything at all the entire time and looked at me weird. When she started walking away I yelled out “Is anybody in there?” to her, but clearly there wasn’t. It’s a bummer because for some weird reason, I don’t know why, my game just doesn’t seem to work on Asian girls. I don’t know what it is but me and Asians don’t seem to click. Guess I’ll have to work on that in the future J. But I think it has to do with the fact that the Asians in my area seem to ONLY hang out with other Asians, and that pisses me off. I have nothing against Asians, but I think when people of any race only limit their social lives with other people of their own race is just plain stupid and gay. I like a nice variety of people.

But anyways I managed to finish on time and came up with a few new random openers just like that. It’s a really great exercise if you try to use different openers each time. It also allows you to test out the ones you have on standby. But after that exercise, me and my buddy were EXHAUSTED. There were a lot less people in the mall and we had to go anyway.

Overall, it was a great day. I feel like it was a step back from where I was a week ago. Before I was able to maintain a conversation for a few minutes and actually number close a girl. Today I didn’t close anyone. I have to remember to transition more thoroughly from my opener and start talking about something else (I’m going to cold read them next time to transition). I still learned a few things though, and to me as long as I learn something, I got better.

Also the girls weren’t really on for me. Like I said, they were a lot less energetic and just plain different from the ones at the other malls, which is weird considering this one is closer to my house. The ones at Promenade or Hillcrest mall seem much more open to me. Maybe it’s my state? A lot of them here also had boyfriends and would throw that out for me but now I thought of a way to counter it. Whenever it happens just say “What does that have anything to do with it?” because unless your going direct, that would seem to fit around most situations. I’ll have to try that out next time.

That pretty much sums up my journey for today. Thank you all for reading my first post and hopefully I’ll be able to thank you again for reading the future ones to come

Happy Sarging,
Pairo

P.S. Today I also thought of a way to approach girls with their moms. It still needs some work, modification, and calibration but once it’s done I’ll be sure to post it here and hopefully you will have the same successes that I’ve had. Hopefully ;)